Finally a police car comes up. Cop to perp: Did you kill this man?, Perp: No, he died of natural causes. Cop: He was shot! Perp: Right a bullet killed him. Thank You for the 28 years you gave It is better to live rich than to die rich. 10. Officer: Do you know why I pulled you over?, Me: You were bored and wanted some company?. How can you tell if you are looking at a police glow worm? What you get by achieving your goals is not as important as what you become by achieving your goals. The time now has come; the time is in your own hands. 55. I guess he wants a rematch because hes been following me for about 45 minutes. Jelly, powdered, glazed, and chocolate frosted. Funny Retired Police Officer Golf Retirement Gift T-Shirt 4.8 (9) $1999 FREE delivery Wed, Mar 8 on $25 of items shipped by Amazon Amazon Merch on Demand 5.0 (10) +4 colors/patterns Retirement Gift Ideas Police Officer Men or Women Mens Retired Police Officer Law Enforcement Sheriff Retirement T-Shirt 5.0 (1) $1799 R.C. Hugh Hefner, Often when you are at the end of something, youre at the beginning of something else. Cars are backed up for miles. Larry Laser, "Working people have a lot of bad habits, but the worst of these is work." Explore the options below for sample police retirement quotes, sayings, best wishes and more. JONATHAN CLEMENTS. Retirement is wonderful. 500 matching entries found. Youll Laugh (or Cry) When You Read These Famous Quotations About Retirement. Call us today at 928-985-6259 and learn more about our facility and what we have to offer todays seniors. Police Officer Gift Plaques & Custom Awards for Sale. As you plan retirement figure out what to say in a retirement card or write a retirement speech you will enjoy reading funny retirement quotes inspirational retirement quotes and much more about this wonderful phase of life. What would you do if I stole a kiss? Give Without Remembering and Its learning to live on less than you make, so you can give money back and have money to invest. The basic mission of Police is to PREVENT crime and disorder. Soni, It is better to live rich than to die rich. Samuel Johnson, If people concentrated on the really important things in life, thered be no shortage of fishing poles. Doug Larson, As for me, except for the occasional heart attack, I feel as young as I ever did. Robert Benchley, The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off. Abe Lemons, You have to put off being young until you can retire. Unknown, There is a whole new kind of life ahead, full of experiences just waiting to happen. For some, the work itself was the bliss, while for others, the work was the poison they couldn't wait to escape. "That's great!" says the doctor. To display your contact list, you must sign in: It's St. Patrick, a Perfect Time to Be Punny! The goal is to enjoy it the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money. Thats ridiculous. 50. Bette Davis, "I need to retire from retirement." Grammar Police Funny Sarcasm Quotes Literary T-Shirt . Our top 50 retirement quotes, wishes and sayings are useful for retirement cards. Retirement is not a life without purpose; it is the ongoing purpose that provides meaningfulness. Gail Sheehy, "Retirement, a time to enjoy all the things you never had time to do when you worked." Live well and prosper. (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}). Charles Lamb. He asked, Would it make a difference if I told you Im in the Air Force? The police officer replied, Yes, but only if you were driving an airplane.. There is a whole new kind of life ahead, full of experiences just waiting to happen. "How did you get your answer?" "Easy," says Martin, "just subtract 191 from Wednesday." 1) Retirement is the beginning of the time when you can sit back and give advice to others, even though you never followed it in your own life. Author Unknown, Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save. Goodbye Tension - Hello Pension! ", "There is a whole new kind of life ahead, full of experiences just waiting to happen. Retirement gives you the time literally to recreate yourself through a sport, game or hobby that you always wanted to try or that you havent done in years. Which dinosaurs were the best policemen? Retirement: When you quit working just before your heart does. When caught speeding, an airman on leave tried to talk an officer out of giving him a ticket. Retirement is not in my vocabulary. A. The policewoman replied, Its square, and it has your picture on it. The driver finally found a square mirror in her purse, looked at it, and handed it to the policewoman. Let me tell all of you the truth, right here and now. Unknown, "How do you know it's time to retire? We can no longer afford to scrap-pile people. 54. Unknown, "Retirement: World's longest coffee break." Sargent: "Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner." Woman: "I bet the bastard will say I was speeding too." sergeant police joke confession woman driver speeding. These quotes are perfect to wish your retiring boss, teachers, doctors and co-workers. Retirement: That's when you return from work one day and say, "Hi, Honey, I"m home - forever." - Gene Perret " You know it's time to retire when the guys ask you if you're "getting any," you think it means sleep. Your guide to financial planning and retirement, Community 2) Old age, fragile bones, doctor visits, medical checkups and a weak bladder - are you still looking forward to retirement? The police had to comb the area. 18. 50 Retirement Quotes: Inspirational and Funny Retirement Sayings. Gene Perret, "Retirement: It's nice to get out of the rat race, but you have to learn to get along with less cheese." 2010-2023Sedona Winds Retirement CommunityAll Rights Reserved. If you are searching for funny retirement quotes, this list is for you! If we command our wealth, we shall be rich and free. Whether you're looking for retirement quotes for coworkers or for a friend, these quotes are perfect for writing in a message or card. After observing some erratic driving, he pulls the man over. Retiring State Trooper Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe, Cessation of work is not accompanied by cessation of expenses. Once police officers join the force, they are part of a tight-knit law enforcement community. All sorted from the best by our visitors. 31. The chicken farmer died under mysterious circumstances. 2023 NewRetirement, Inc. All rights reserved. An officer comes across a man who is clearly under the influence. Funny Retirement Quotes for your Boss. If you dont mind, it doesnt matter. Dick Van Dyke, "Choose a work that you love and you won't have to work another day." Before you retire, save. significant financial decision. There s a retired person in the premises with not a lot to do and plenty of stories to tell. 3. The police retirement gifts listed above are awesome, for sure. 33. Know what you own, and know why you own it. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. You've got a new assignment officer - enjoying your retirement! When I was sixty-five I still had pimples." Take financial wellness into your own hands and do it yourself retirement planning: easy, Arthur E. Morgan, Before you speak, listen. George Burns, "Age is just a number, but retirement is one of the greatest gifts to mankind." Pinterest. Oh, my friend, that can't be! ~ Ernie Harwell. You Never Swerved From the Path of Duty. Leonard Cohen, I need to retire from retirement. Unknown, "The best time to start thinking about your retirement is before the boss does." A beautiful and sentimental law enforcement poem to mark the special occasion of a police officers retirement. Your tireless work ethic and He or she who laughs last at the boss's jokes probably isn't far from retirement. Retirement may be looked upon either as a prolonged holiday or as a rejection, a being thrown on to the scrap-heap. 30. It's time to work on your golf game, enjoy retirement! to utter words, but to live by them. to the New York Police Department. Max Asnas, Another good thing about being poor is that when you are seventy your children will not have declared you legally insane in order to gain control of your estate. Fitzhugh Dodson, NewRetirement Planner: The Best Way to Achieve a Secure Retirement, The best time to start thinking about your retirement is before the boss does. Gilbert K. Chesterton, Men and women approaching retirement age should be recycled for public service work, and their companies should foot the bill. Custom and user added quotes with pictures. Before you criticize, wait. Thats how he contributes to the welfare of the community. Police were called to a daycare center where a three-year-old was resisting a rest. Act like the inner young person you have always been. J.A. We enjoy success due to your leadership, 12. The best part about is that they will be relatable to just about. "Here's to a well-deserved and happy retirement! Offer financial wellness to the people at the heart of your business. Nothing happens by accident. For Your Loyal and Dedicated Service No gold watch could ever top it. Abigail Charleson. Take us with you! as you follow in His way, J. The guy touches his elbow and winces in . Richard Thaler, Not having to worry about money is almost like not having to worry about dying. When Cops Retire. But sometimes you're looking for the perfect idea for someone really special, and you need something creative and unique. Ernest Hemingway, Theres no retirement for an artist, its your way of living so theres no end to it. The officer says, Maam, there are warnings posted up and down this highway. 124 Retirement Quotes: Funny Retirement Quotes, Inspirational Retirement Quotes and More! are presented without warranty. Beautiful Retirement Poems Each poet examines the fundamental opposites of bliss and poison. Steve Young, A retired husband is often a wifes full-time job. There are some who start their retirement long before they stop working. 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You have always dreamed of concentrating on your own project. Funny Retirement Quotes "Retirement is wonderful. A police officer pulled me over and said, Papers.. #7 Dear husband, you have been successful all your life. Dianne Nahirny, "A lot of our friends complain about their retirement. 6. I cant get old; Im working. I was arrested by the grammar police for not using the full stop correctly. Facts about financial success later in life! To return Click Here. Police retirement thank you quotes and sayings can be hard to settle on, so weve curated some wonderful options that would all look stunning as an engraving on 100 percent optical crystal. Officer: "I have to give you a ticket for not wearing your glasses." Driver: "Officer, I have contacts." Officer: "I don't care who you know, you're still getting a ticket." New England Patriots/Giphy 31. You grow old when you stop laughing. George Bernard Shaw, To me, retirement means doing what you have fun doing. Dick Van Dyke, Retirement is wonderful if you have two essentials: much to live on and much to live for. Unknown, Retirement: thats when you return home from work one day and say, Hi honey, Im home forever. Gene Perret, Retirement is not the end of the road. A cop caught a graffiti artist spraying a police station in a thick font. Retirement is like coming home one day and telling your wife honey i m home for good.